Check Yes or No

Do you remember those love letters you would pass in elementary? " Do you like me? Check yes or no" I remember those letters. I remember the fearlessness in which they would be written and received. As an adult, the idea of giving one or receiving one is a bit scary. As a child, it was just fun and curiosity. I had an interesting conversation with my 3 year old this morning. He wakes up and says, "Mom Mr. Shine Shine is awake!" Mindful of my parental responsibilities and wanting my children to know God I reply, "Do you know that God made Mr. Shine Shine?" My 3 year old with all his wisdom replies, "Yep! God made Mr. Shine Shine, branches, and dog bones! I like him!" The powerful part of that statement to me was, "I like him!" If someone asked you if you love God, more than likely our response would be, "Of course I love God! He's God! Why wouldn't I love him?!?!" From experience that response is more of a standard one! From experience, there's a bit of guilt with that response because that love is out of a sense of obligation rather than a relationship. Let's table love for a second, and ask a harder question. Do you LIKE God? I believe if we answer honestly, then we don't know if we like God. Why don't we know? Because we don't take the time to get to know him. We base our opinion of God on what we see of people claiming to be Christians or believers. Or the stories we heard in Sunday School as children, that's enough knowledge right? When in reality we don't care to take the time to get to know him. Why mess with the status quo? If we're doing more than a few people we know, then that's enough right? If we're generally a good person then that's enough right? The hard truth is no, its not enough. God desires a relationship with us! Gods love for each of us, I believe, is something our human minds can't truly fathom. I have a son, would I sacrifice my son for people? I can honestly say, heck no! But Gods love was so great for us, that he said yes. I want to not only love God, I want to LIKE him as well! I don't want it to be out of a sense of obligation, duty, or guilt. I want it to be a direct result of getting to know him! I don't want to read my Bible, Pray, go to church because I feel its the right thing to do; I want to read my Bible, Pray, and go to church because I hunger for more from this awe inspiring God! When God passes me that love letter, I want to HONESTLY and WHOLEHEARTEDLY check yes! All I hope is that you figure out if you'd check yes or no . . .

Pass It On

God places people in our lives. I believe he purposefully places people in our lives to be a blessing, an encouragement, and to help us learn hard lessons we would rather not face. I believe God places people in our lives for us to be a blessing, an encouragement , and to help them through hard and trying times. The Bible says we are made in Gods image. I take that to mean we are to imitate God. So what is God? He is mercy. He is love. He is compassion. He is so many things we can't even begin to imagine! I continually pray for God to help me be a better person. And I like to believe that keeping that in mind and with Gods help I reflect a glimmer of his incredible mercy, love, and compassion! I believe it means I give love freely and without conditions! I'm finding that it is not hard to give my love. Because every bit or love I give, I find myself a bit closer to my Heavenly Father! To be honest it is a glorious thing! O how I love him and I can't wait for the day I get to see him! Keeping this in mind I do my best to be thankful for each and every person he has placed in my path. So try your best to give a kind word whether you believe the person deservea it or not! God has already said that they are! God has freely given each and every one or us his love ... so do your best to pass it on "Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your rather which is in heaven" Matthew 5:16 "The light of the body is the eye: if therefore your eye be single, your your whole body shall be full of light" Matthew 6:22

Take him at his Word ...

The other night my 3 year old repeatedly wakes crying with the words, "no no no no" I realize he's having a bad dream and my husband immediately asks our son if he wants us to pray. We receive a sleepy yes, so we begin to pray for our son. In a matter of moments he's asleep and snoring. I'm laying there holding my precious baby boy when I realize its that simple for him! We pray for him and he has no doubt that God has taken away the monsters and he can now rest peaceably. I'm thinking about the fact that as adults we don't trust God nearly enough or give him enough credit! And we use all kinds of excuses to neatly sidestep the call of Faith he desires from us! But I believe the truth of the matter is we can't really wrap our heads around the fact that God is God! The same way its hard for us to truly comprehend Gods love for us! At the bottom of the matter is do we sincerely, truly trust God? Not just love him for what he's done? Do we wholeheartedly believe he can keep all those promises he made to his children? You may say yes but deep down in the recesses of your heart do you believe it? I'll admit I have trouble processing it! But I'm learning that the closer I am to God the more easily my trust in him becomes! God does keep his promises, its just realizing we have to take him at his word!

Long Winding Road . . .

So my last post was in August and it's been a crazy ride since then! I was offered a job and after A LOT of prayer, accepted. I worked at this job from September thru December. I didn't mind the job itself and felt completely at peace with the choice I had made. However towards the end of December I started feeling like it was time to move on . . . I kept thinking, 'God you want me to quit?!?!?!' I don't take leaving a job lightly. So it definately boggled my mind that I was feeling a nudge to leave and move on! However, God and his infinite Grace opened a door for me with another company. It shortened my drive by 40 minutes and increased my income. I'll be honest here and say I still hesitated to leave job #1. God had opened another door for me, was giving me peace about changing jobs, he all but pushed me through the door himself. But still I hesitated! It was completely nothing but fear! I kept thinking, 'Did I make the wrong decision to begin with?' After some encouraging words from my husband, I took that leap and left Job #1 for Job #2.  Taking the time to read my Bible and Pray is definately something I have trouble doing! And having the desire to follow God's will for my life and NOT reading my Bible and Praying for direction is even harder! I don't want to be one of those people that talk the talk and profess to have God on speed dial when in reality I don't even have the right phone number! I want to be at peace with my relationship with God! I want to feel him with me daily! I know that God doesn't leave me, it's me that leaves God! And not praying and reading my Bible is one sure way of forgetting him when I walk out the door! So i'm still at Job #2 and some amazing opportunities have opened up for me! And now I look back and think, 'God knew EXACTLY where I was going! I'm the one that forgot to look at my GPS!' So i'm still on this Long Winding Road, Praying daily I don't end up in the ditch . . .

Prayer . . .

So i'm driving down the road and my mind is full of all the decisions my husband and I have to make. They are not decisions we've forseen in our future, and not one of them was necessarily bad. However i'm still stressing. So i've got another 15 or 20 minutes until I make it home and I just feel the need to pray. I think i'll wait until I get home, occupy the kids, and go pray. Not happening! So when I pray I cry, something God put in my genetic code I think! So I pray my way on down the road and home. I get home and go to get my three year old out of his carseat and he says, "Mommy you crying?" Not wanting him to be upset I say, "No baby, Mommy is just talking to God" At this point my three year old looks at me and says, "Jesus loves you" The only thought that ran through my mind was WOW! Even as simple as that statement is, it seemed so profound coming from him! Jesus loves me, I am his child! It IS that simple! Jesus wants the best for me, and what he has for me will always be so much more than I could ever create for myself! The key is being that willing vessel. Keeping myself open to God and his will! I'm not saying it's always an easy thing, honestly it's a hard thing for me! I've always been a very independent person! It's hard for me to rely on anyone other than myself! But God is GOD! He created me and this earth! Who am I to argue with the one who spoke it all into being? So although those decisions still haven't been made, I do believe the remedy is prayer . . .

Contradictions . . .

So being a stay at home mom I described as 'idle', I sure have contradicted myself! I have had one thing or another for the last solid week every day! Right now i'm honestly wishing it was next Tuesday so I could have a day at home to do nothing! I wonder if this is a little joke from God? The honest scary truth, is that I feel that God wants me to stay home at the moment. I don't believe that a womans only place is in the home, however I don't believe it isn't either. I do believe God made each of us wonderfully unique! I believe that everyone needs to seek God for their purpose and calling and not rely on 'laws' made by different religions. So whether God calls a person to be an astronaut, a missionary, a drive thru attendant at McDonalds, or a stay at home parent I believe it is completely between the individual and God. Not the individual, God, and Pastor, Spouse, Parent, Mentor, etc. However, I do admit I find it hard to ignore others opinions, beliefs, and pessimism. So while I don't understand why God wants me to stay home, I suppose it's what I will do! I do feel however that this is temporary! I have a long prayer list (don't we all) And I just feel like God is telling me to be patient, He has something wonderful around the corner for us!  Psalm 48:14 says "For this is God, Our God forever and ever; He will be our guide Even to death" So who am I to doubt? God has more than proved himself in my life, I know however that I have to allow him to work! I can't hold on to everything and expect him to be able to work in my life! Another example of, "Letting Go and Letting God" I have to Let Go and Let God be my guide in all things! (Easier said than done!) So if you have a major decision in your life and feel confused, I hope it gives you comfort to know that you are not alone in that boat! The hard part is letting God steer!

There aren't even Words!!

So I was hoping to have something wise and wonderful to post . . . but honestly my day has been exhausting. Emotionally I am just done for the day! Logically I know that there are tons out there that have had a worse day than me! There are those out there that are facing unimaginable horrors and I faced a hard day as a Mom. My three year old had his first bout with stitches due to a mishap playing tag! And of course he hated the whole episode and fought it the entire time! When I finally got home I locked myself and my youngest outside and my oldest in! Thank God he figured out how to unlock our door! I'm no closer to knowing what the next bend in the road of my life will bring, but once again I don't even care at the moment! I care about getting a good nights rest and hoping tomorrow will be at least a bit less stressful. I would just like to add: Why is it so hard to discipline your kids when they've been hurt? So I'm gonna try and get some rest. Here's a funny little thought for you all: What do you call a nun in a wheel chair?  virgin mobile! :D